What is the balance between too much effort, doing without softness, and kinesthetic delight, that subtle sensation of rightness that is, maybe, indulgent? I find myself trying to be better, stronger, in less pain, be lovable. It’s effortful. Also I find myself working on what’s wrong. Kinesthetic delight feels different. When I find this delight, I sense relaxation with being alive, in the midst of effort, and everything changes. My training in classical ballet and Merce Cunningham technique required so much effort. And I loved it, this sensation of big trying and strong muscles. I loved showing up again and again for rigor and repetition. Then slowly slowly it became something I had to feel. I had to feel effort in order to feel any thing. Much later kinesthetic delight was revealed and offered a different way. Now the effort is to remember to come back to this very moment and find the gentle delight.